I was asked to submit a piece of writing for the identities project, an Instagram page celebrating people from across the world on the gender spectrum. I was a bit nervous about taking part, but it was a good chance to reflect on my journey so far. In this I talk about starting Testosterone therapy, not owing anyone masculinity, and being happy.

Here it is!

I’m Travis, I’m a 35 year old bisexual trans man living in Bristol in the UK. I’d like to think I’m waving the flag for all the older non binary Black trans guys out there who have just started their journeys too. I started my medical transition fairy recently and It’s been a journey to say the least. This month I’m coming up to celebrating 4 months on testosterone and I’m really happy with the little changes that I’ve noticed that have really helped me mentally. I’m starting to look in the mirror and now I see the person I always have been staring back at me, this happy grinning guy who’s ready for anything.

The most important thing I’ve learnt on my journey so far is that as trans men we don’t owe anyone masculinity, transition is and means different things for everyone, it’s not a race, and you have to look after your head as much as you’re starting to look after your body as your hormone therapy continues. I’m doing this by seeing a queer trans friendly therapist regularly, along with check ins with my endocrinologist to make sure both my body and head are happy. I feel very lucky that I’m able to do this as I realise not everyone has access to the same things to help them in their transition.

It’s been a wild year with Covid, lockdowns etc, but despite all the bad stuff I feel very lucky that I’ve been able to start this journey when I did. I’m a bit older than some, but don’t regret the journey it took to get here, or who I was before because I’ve learnt so much, and without it I wouldn’t have the tools to become the man I am today.

To all those just at the start of their journey like me. You’re valid and you’re doing great. Stay happy and safe.

Thanks for reading.

xTravis x